This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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