just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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