Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
