it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
