Sponge bath it is.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
