Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Randomize