I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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