You can't motorboat a personality
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Randomize