"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
