Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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