1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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