As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
