Writing my paper on freud at bar
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Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
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