would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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