what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
