how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize