Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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