So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
