i barfeds in our rink
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
