Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
