Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
