Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize
