Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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