He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize