Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
