I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
