you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
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