I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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