Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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