It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
