using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
