We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
