I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
