I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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