Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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