I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
