the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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