Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
