I have demons in me.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm passing your future prison.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
