Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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