it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
