I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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