My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
