watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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