The brown eye won't let me do that either.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
