Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I can't put those talents on a resume
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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