There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize
