These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
