She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize