He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
